218am
Oooooooooooooooh my. These last few days have been something else, I'll tell ya. It's going to be long. Let's just start from the beginning.
Thursday
Day started off fantastic! We were going to see a play that night so Erin and I decided we'd wear dresses for the day. That was fun, I love wearing dresses. I ended up wearing the one I wore for Easter.
I went up to school around lunch time and had a picnic with David in the park across from DAAP. I packed us a big lunch with warm food I heated up right before in the microwave in DAAP. It was so nice! The weather was perfect, there were almost no bugs, we goofed off, had fun, and talked. It was wonderful.
After that, we picked up Erin, Jess, Alex and went to Harley to try on clothes for my mom's fashion show. Ryan and Laura met us there. This was the second round of friends I took in (David, Sam, Tim, Laura, Tiny, and Holly being the first) to try on clothes for the show, so I already knew what to look for for them. And of course that's always fun.
When we finished up there, David, Ryan, Erin, Alex, Madeline, Tiny and I went to St. X to see their school play, Urinetown. And yes, it was freaking hysterical. They showed us around the school after it was over. Holy shit. I thought about Beechwood: three hallways total in the high school where you can see from one end to the other easily. Now here's a little fact about St. X: 4 FUCKING MILES OF HALLWAY! Yes, you read right. Good. Lord. They have everything and more. For starters, how we always had our school plays in the caffetorium, they have two theaters- a professional one and a blackbox. It's sick. An olympic size indoor pool, huge football stadium, two baseball fields, soccer, tracks, three gyms, etc. Ridiculous. And totally awesome. I was super jealous until I was reminded they had to pay ten grand a year to go there. :) Yay Beechwood for being cheap!
Back to the day: after the show, we dropped off Alex (because he wanted to go drink) and picked up Matt to go to Skyline to eat around eleven. As we went to leave, I realized I locked my keys in the car. Fail. So all seven of us packed into Ryan's car, we dropped them off then Ryan, Erin, David and I drove to Fort Mitchell. Erin needed to go home anyway to grab her car for work the next day so it wasn't like we were going out of the way to get my spare set, thank goodness.
Friday
We got my car alright and headed to the dorms. It was a little after midnight and I was originally planning on hanging out for a bit, then heading home. David had a Topics in Math exam the next day (topics basically being a joke class. It's what people take when math isn't necessary for their major. Smart people to it anyway. I was dumb and took an actual math class. Boo.) so I wasn't going to stay. We walked in his room and see Alex, Matt, and two other DAAP kids on Alex's side drinking. When we walk to David's side, we see toilet paper. Everywhere. They coated his side and wove it between and around everything! It was a web! Then Tiny and another DAAP girl popped out from under the bed. The whole mess was hysterical. After everyone snapped pictures of the masterpiece, I trudged through it and came out absolutely covered and wrapped in tp. Very funny.
After we cleaned it all up, David and I laid down. We just laid there, me on one of his beds, him on the other, holding hands with our eyes closed. We were exhausted from the last couple days. Every once in a while, Matt would come over and talk to us or do something inappropriate (he was a tiny bit drunk, but he's pretty much always like that). Most of the people in the room left and David asked if I would just stay the night instead of leaving and I of course said yes. We're probably a strange couple to most people. Despite the crazy things we do because we're so nerdy and goofy, we don't act like "normal" college students. Usually when I stay the night, we actually sleep. Or we'll watch a movie or anime, do random silly stuff, make out, do homework or just talk. "Normal" college kids would have sex when they stay the night. Boo being normal :D
He got changed and gave me some of his clothes to sleep in and we snuggled together in his bed. Alex was getting ready to go to bed too but someone called first. David and I whispered about whatever for a tiny bit before drifting to that state where you're not really awake but not asleep just yet. He was still stroking my shoulder but his eyes were shut and I could still feel him and kind of hear Alex talking but I wasn't really conscious.
Now here's where it takes off.
Suddenly, we were both startled awake but what sounded like a crash on Alex's side. We both figured something just fell or he knocked something over. He had been off the phone for a minute or so and I figured he bumped into something getting into bed. But then the loud smash came again. David asked him if everything was alright. Alex said, yeah, I just punched my wall. David and I looked at each other, still kind of out of it and not sure how to react or what to do. David asked if he was alright and Alex said yes, nothing broken except the skin. David and I stayed silent a moment, still not sure what to do until Alex did it yet again. I jumped out of bed and ran over to his side to a.) make sure he was okay and b.) to get him to stop. I was scared for him; I'd never seen him (or heard I guess would be better) act this way.
He was lying face down in bed so I sat down by him, rubbed his back and asked what was up. He said he just got off the phone with the girl he liked. They'd been friends for a long time and was pretty sure he loved her. Turns out, she fucked some guy to get back at whatever boy she liked (Junior from Sigma Chi I found out later). To make matters worse, the guy she fucked was Breen- David, Matt, and Sam's roommate next year and also a friend of Alex's. They were at the Sig Chi party (Breen is a pledge) and were both wasted. Not an excuse really, or at all for that matter. Even when you're drunk, you know who you're fucking, haha.
But yeah, he was livid. I tried to calm him down, tell him there are other, better girls out there and such, when the DAMN FIRE ALARM WENT OFF! It was like three in the morning. Absolutely perfect. Alex screams fuck and stomps out the door. David and I got our shoes and started down the seven flights to get outside but had lost Alex. We couldn't find him when we got outside either. Somehow, in the crowd of 800 or so amassed out there, we managed to find almost every one of our friends except him. Then Matt comes up to us, still a little off his game, and tells us Alex just ran off to go to Sigma Chi or UPA (the apartments where Breen lives). Well shit Matt! Why didn't you stop him!?
A fireman started talking to the crowd though so we tried to listen to him but were too far away to hear anything. When he was done, Matt told us some interesting news- the girl that caused all this trouble was David's ex-girlfriend, Megan. David broke up with her early this past winter. He wanted to have more time and meet other people because she was the only one he'd ever dated and they did so for a long time. David didn't really react much so I didn't think a whole lot into the situation. I was only concerned that Alex didn't hurt himself. Matt called him and found out he was sitting in the stadium. Sam, Matt, and David went to go find him and calm him down.
While they were gone I talked to Cat for a little bit-which was the first real conversation I'd ever had with her so that was cool- and then Chad and Joel joined us. Apparently Chad and Sam were at the party when the two hooked up. They both kind of knew it wasn't a good idea, but didn't know Megan or Breen really well enough to stop anything. Then Joel and Chad complained about how I never see them anymore because I'm always with David. Buttheads. Hey, if they asked me to hang out once in a while, I totally would! So we argued about that for a bit.
We were outside for maybe 45 minutes now when another fireman started to talk. Turns out someone pulled the alarm and set off the sprinklers, someone else broke the card swipe to let people in, another person threw up in the staircase, and there was also blood(?). So we were not allowed in until they cleaned up the water, vomit, and blood. Also, since I guess this had been happening so often, they were setting a curfew for this dorm. People would be locked out after a certain time. Sucks for those late night drinkers and DAAP kids working. Boo to this one too.
They were letting people in the dorm now when Matt came back and said Alex had calmed down, but apparently David was pissed about the situation. I started to get worried when I heard that. Did he still care about her that much or in that way? I began to feel sick to my stomach and grabbed onto Matt for support. He asked if we should go to the guys because I didn't have a key to get into the room. So we did.
I talked to him about me being worried on the way there. He tried to reassure me and told me again that I was a much better choice (something he'd told David when he told us it was Megan). He told me David loves me (which I can't really believe to be true. It could have been the alcohol in Matt talking) and that he was more mad at Breen-being his future roommate and all- than upset with Megan. So that kind of helped.
We got to the stadium and got the guys to come back. David kept some space between us which, being the way I am, I totally over thought. Really, it wasn't any different from any other time we walk when we're not holding hands. I was just entering my concealed freak out mode. I reached out for his hand and he took it, which made me feel much better.
When we got back to they dorm, things again took a turn for the worst.
When I was walking back from the restroom, I head a loud smash in the guys bathroom. I knew what it was but I prayed I was wrong. When I got in the room, David wasn't there. I just laid down and tried to calm myself and tell myself it was someone else, but when David walked in, Alex asked him how badly he'd hurt his hand.
The thing about David, he is never anything besides calm and happy. Nothing. This was, not quite frightening--I could never be afraid of him--, but very shocking. What I was terrified of was the fact that he was this upset over it. There's no way he'd be this mad over a roommate sleeping with an ex. It had to be more about her.
When he came over and lied down, all I could do was kiss his hurt hand, ask him if he was alright, and roll over and try to sleep. He put his arm over me and nestled up into my back. Then Alex got another call. It was Megan. He didn't answer the first time. He had asked David if he should and he said he didn't care. Alex answered the second time she called.
It was miserable. It took the breath from me and I started shaking. The things Alex said... I guess she brought up David because Alex said how much she hurt David, how he was heartbroken, and other things I couldn't hear or now can't remember because I was concentrating on not shaking so much that David would notice. After a couple seconds of it though, I threw off the covers and jumped out of the bed. I couldn't look at David. I just told him I'd be back and I basically ran out of the room.
Not knowing where else to go, I went down to the second floor and found Matt. I was fighting back tears at that point. He was in the lobby talking to some people from his floor (this was around 5 mind you) and I managed to choke out that I needed to talk to him. He could clearly tell something was wrong and he quickly hopped up and took me around the corner to another hallway. The second he asked what was wrong tears started rushing out. I told him what Alex had said and all that and just lost it. He pulled me into his chest and hugged me for a couple minutes until I calmed down some. He was either still a little intoxicated or maybe was just trying to hold me together, because he was squeezing a little too tight. I needed the support though or I would have fallen so I was okay with it. Getting that upset made me ridiculously dizzy. The whole heart pumping fast nonsense.
Matt went to his room and got me some water and we sat and talked for a little bit. My body was still shaking which he told me a couple times freaked him out. So he walked me up stairs and back to the room. I didn't feel much better when I got there, but I'd stopped crying and shaking and I felt better knowing Matt cared for me as much as he did. The cool thing is, I know how in love Matt is with his girlfriend so I don't have to worry about anything from him.
I went back in the room and stumbled my way through the dark room to David's side. Alex asked if it was me, so I knew he was off the phone now. I didn't know what else was said or what happened which left room for my mind to wonder. Always a bad thing.
I got in bed and lied down. David, in an attempt I'm guessing-or hoping- to lighten the mood, told me it was my turn to be the big spoon. He turned away and I put my arm over him. I felt weird though. Things weren't right. My eyes kept welling up with my thoughts about the situation and I'm sure he noticed me wiping them.
I couldn't sleep. Alex couldn't either evidently because about a half hour later, he announced that he had to call her back. All that I could think was a pleading, "please, no." I didn't think I could take more talk about how much pain David was in over it. I somehow managed to tune him out though and fell asleep pretty quickly.
I woke up a couple times throughout the night and there was always a gap between David and me or he was facing away. It was never normally like this. Definitely made things worse.
We woke up in the morning around eleven something. I had slept through my art history class (not a big deal), and he had slept through his math exam (very big deal).
So he yells fuck and I bury my head under the blankets. He goes on to complain about how things couldn't get much worse and I couldn't agree more. This sucks. I've never even seen him upset before. It was just awful.
While he emailed his teacher, worked to get a note from his doctor saying he was sick, and angrily got ready for the day, I silently changed into the spare clothes I had in his room for when I stay over and sat off to the side. It was miserable.
45 minutes-ish (I think) later, he looked over at me from his computer-he had calmed down by this point-and said something about me being really quiet. I just shrugged. I felt sick frankly and couldn't muster up anything to say. He smiled then and thanked me for being there for him. That made me smile for the first time that day.
Alex and David were getting hungry then. I walked to center court with them and David held my hand on the way there. I could not eat though so I told them I needed to go home to shower and such. David looked really sad but I really needed to get away from this mess. He gave me a kiss and I left.
It was raining of course-very fitting. Very fortunate too, because by the time I got to my car, tears were streaming from my eyes. I really couldn't deal with something like this yet again. I cried the whole way home. I'm rather surprised I didn't run off the road or anything.
I talked to Alex for a bit while I was home about the situation. I didn't much want to talk over text so I pretty much just told him that I was scared and upset because I was afraid David still had feelings for Megan as more than a friend. He tried to comfort me some but it didn't work too well. I stayed at home until six or seven before going back up to school to do some work. I had told David and Alex I'd come back up and I put it off as long as I could.
I was under control again but I still felt ill and stayed quiet while I worked in the studio. David was on the computer and didn't say much and Alex was in the hallway with Tiny. Luckily no one else really said much to me either. I'm not sure I would have been okay.
I couldn't work. After staring at the space project for ten minutes or so, I put it all away and as I went to grab my bags to leave, David noticed and asked where I was going. I was just going to go home, but I told him I was going to go outside and read for a little bit. He smile, grabbed his computer, and said he'd join me.
We ended up sitting on DaapSlapp, reading and working for a while before I stopped reading because it was getting dark. He and I then started goofing off and all like nothing was different and I forgot about the whole thing. After an hour or so more, we went inside to clean up the things he'd left out. Alex and Matt were both there and saw that I was smiling; both of them gave me that look (you know the one, like 'so things are good?' or something like that).
David and I went back to the dorms then and messed around. While we were there, Alex sent him a message asking how I was. I asked David why he'd ask that and David told me Alex told him what I said. Dang it Alex! But hey, I felt much better now. We ended up falling asleep with him holding me around eleven and woke up sometime in the middle of the night. I had to be back at school at 845 anyway to pick people up for the Harley show the next morning so he just suggested I stay again.
So things are just fine now, great even :)
